How hard it is to be honest...

I just wanted to start sharing my experience in a blog because its so tough for me to be honest about how I am feeling...
Life has been super tough for me lately...
I was diagnosed february 14, 2011 and ever since ms has been a part of my daily life...
So hard...
I still look good...
In fact I look better than I ever have!!!
Minus a few white hairs...
But then stuff starts piling in, my injuries, infections and allergies...
Time passes in a flash...
Everyone asking I am okay...
Missing opportunities...
Not able to reach out to friends...
Inside I want to write everyone, let them know I miss them and love them but the ms troll get in front of me...
The true challenge is to be truly honest and that is the only thing people relate too...
otherwise there is no point...
Everyday I learn valuable lessons..
by the time I am old I will be smarter...
Nothing like a good dress to cheer a woman up..
I want to share all day long...
I want sharing to be a habit, a release and also help others...
I need to be honest about it all...
bladder issues...
battle with pain...
foot drop...
fatique...
ms hug, tension around my mid-back/ribs...
the cog. fog...
the miracle stories of a friend of a friend...
is that a relapse or a bad day?
Is this symptom lasting for more than 48 hours?
How can you plan when you feel different every other day?
Pain upon arising every morning...
Tight muscle cramping...
stretching every morning in pain when I wake up...
Terribly stiff hours of the day...
Have to eat...
Eat clean for good health but that takes a shit ton of energy...
Tired by lunch and havent done anything but life matinence...
I have hand controls on my moms car now because I cant afford a car, nor have the energy to drive that much...
I dont miss driving that much...
Hand controls and a handicap pass... super vip!
the cane that is as much a part of me as my phone except I can go longer without the cane...
Super emotional, but trying harder than ever to be honest which comes with tears...
Tears of fears and disappointment...
I hope that after these few years of adjusting I will be able to conquer this ms thing...